Friday, July 18, 2008

Why don't I look like a Lesbian?

I speak my mind, I'm very open.. I don't mind saying what I feel.



In the last year I have come to terms with something I have always known. I am a Lesbian.. ahh the L word.. how scary for some, and intriguing for others.



We live in such a world where everything HAS to be in a box, HAS to labeled HAS to be something we can DEFINE and stick a LABEL to. for what? for lazy ass people who are so IGNORANT. I get why stereo-types are made. But like time, things change, they evolve and are never what you ASSUMED because of what you were told.



There are many colors, shades, shapes, forms, etc. of people and "stereo-types".



My mom sayed to me the other day "why do you always have to wear rainbow bracelets, always promoting your gay".

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--My mom is one of the most DOPEST souls to grace this earth. She doesn't care if I ever date a guy or girl (she would perfer me to end up with a dude and have grandkids- what parent doesn't, I am an only child) My mom just wants me to be with someone who makes me happy, regardless race, rich, poor, short, blind, etc.

--

So I explain to her I'm ALWAYS getting told 'You dont look Lesbian'. and I'm single sh*t! lol.



So what are Lesbians supposed to look like?

Even at gay clubs I still get asked "are you really gay or just Bi"

Have you ever noticed that when a male is to good looking it's always sayed "HE MUST BE GAY" or "DAMN HE'S TO FINE TO BE GAY" or the famous "WHAT A WASTE"
a waste of what? you think he would be perfect for a female? that they would like happily ever after? so Brad Pitt isn't a waste .. well thats not really fair cuz he is with 1 of the most gorgeous females on this earth (ooh and she did play GIA, thats another story for another day lol.

)

but what does looks have to matter? beautiful kids? I mean really?

if we speak about being vain... I have been told "your so pretty your ex is stupid to have left you"or "i thought you would have a girlfriend".. what does being "pretty" have to do with anything? obviously I am single so my appearance has nothing to do with compatibility in a relationship. Doesn't matter what you look like (yes, I know how many times do we hear that) but it's TRUE. If someone isn't in love with you doesn't mean cuz your good looking that will make up for that persons faults. and guess what.. what "pretty" is to you is not to someone else.


I have heard people say at times "He was cute when he doesn't speak" or "she's ugly inside" .



Halley Barry.. Stunning! .. her man cheated retarded! so looks has nothing to do with it. it's a shell.



we live in a vain society. it's pretty scary how judgmental and self indulgent as a society majority have become.



so why is it accepted for a male to be good looking and gay, thats the '"stereo-type"

crazy right? when Females are often mentioned in the bible and historic stories as Goddesses and the most "beautiful creature on earth" for who? for men? why cuz thats what god wants? cuz he created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve or Eve and Eve? LOL.




I'm not into religon but I respect all. I'm just making a point.



I think up till recently Gay/Lesbian was something not really accepted in our culture, sure we all have family members or knew a 1 or 2* in school. but now it's like the trend, every girl is Bi (usually when drunk) or everyone is all for gay rights. Dope. We now have gay marraige.. t.v shows, talk shows, etc.. bout time!

and yes we have all seen the *Dyke's, Butch* there are alot of terms, Femme, Lipstick Lesbian, Girly, Stud, Tomboy.



When did I know I was? well since I was like 5! ...

the comments i get . of course from guys. "You never had me thats why!" blah blah blah. but guess what I have. I have had sex .. I'm not a "virgin" whooopty doo, and guess what..

I tried.. and I didn't like. I have dated guys, had boyfriends, but I thought it was because I had to? if that makes sense? no one was forcing me but I really don't know alot of "Gay" people in my social surroundings, sure 99% of girls I know are Bi but not gay. I use to think and say I pick the wrong guys. but that wasn't it. I just wasn't interested in my soul. no matter how much I thought I was into a guy.. maybe that was my "PHASE"

So you know what I don't care that some of my friends say "it's a phase" , your just mad at guys right "now".... I think your just "confused"

Confused? NO human on this earth can feel what I feel, can understand what I am attracted to, what connections I have with a female. It's like me tell you what you are, what you like, and what gender you perfer.

stupid right?

I have ALWAYS felt comftorable with girls. the touch, everything I love it.



When a guy asks me.. "why do you like girls" simple answer.

Why do you?

OKAY THEN =)

I have 99% male friends. I love them, mad cool, always hugs hello and bye, all gravey. But when a foo I dont know or the few that hit on me and trys to touch me playen around.. Its uncomfortable feeling for me.



I like tomboys, I like tomboyish girls. no not cuz they look like guys.. it's just something I find MAD sexy. I dont like girls that act like guys. I don't like "toys" Im' not your "typical" Lesbian. I hope a new word is created cuz i dont really like lesbians but not everyone is in the world I am.



Nothing is wrong with being Bi either. I totally believe you can be seriously attracted to both genders.



THESE ARE MY OPINIONS, I'm not gonna debate something so personal with people, if you dont believe it coo but you can not say NO SUCH THING AS BI .. cuz I KNOW SOMEONE , BLAH BLAH BLAHHHHHH

every single one of us is unique like a finger print. I can't possibly go into someone else's dna and change their strain.. it's who they are.



and yes, much like society there are always the ignorant ones. Have you ever noticed when you say "I KNOW" someone is always there to say "NO YOU DON'T" or try to debate you.



Damn, let people be! lol

straight is a gender... doesn't mean they are a different being, a different human or specie.. its just a matter of how they like to get sexual!!!!

comedy how people assume so fast gays can't have kids or adopt for the fear of "molestation".. really? so do the homework on how many "straight" men are in for child abuse, molestation and rape.



you know its not bout being gay or straight.. have you ever thought it's part of HUMAN NATURE? before you freak out by what I just sayed it's not in EVERYONES Human Nature, it's a EVIL AND DISGUSTING trait but it's not fair to put such horrific violations on one's sexual prefrence.. ya dig?


Now what I think is the most HILARIOUS sh*t ever is when macho guys I know Freak like a lil F*cken girl when some gay guys are around, they act like bees are going to attack.. and most of the time.. trust.. the gay dudes are SO not interested in them lol. talk about flatter yourself.



I totally understand why they don't agree with their lifestyle cool. but seriously to go out of your way when they probably aren't even giving you a glance.. it aint that serious lol they dont have "cuddies". they dont have some special gay fairy dust just waiting to spray on you...

Its like animals, you dont have to like them but you don't have to go out of your way to make them suffer or abuse them. It's sad I have use this analogy when speaking of other people, it's sad I have to speak of "gays" in a sense where they are not normal or a fellow person.



It's a sexual preference.. educate yourself. yes.. there will be the ones who start the stereo-types, and there will be the ones who give others a bad name.. THATS EVERYTHING IN EVERYTHING WE DO AND KNOW.. GOOD AND BAD.. HEROIC AND EVIL.



yea I was off topic but I kept the theme going ...

So I still don't know what a lesbian is SUPPOSED to look like other then what society thinks we look like.



But you know me, I'm a human, person, daughter, friend, and I like girls. My name is Alexis. I hope I won't have to add Lesbian to my name.


I don't mind questions, but stupid over the top unnecessary ones.. I can do without.



People change their mind. How many older females have kids, had a husband are now with lesbian, OR DONT EVEN CONSIDER them self lesbian, they just fell in love with a female and thats who they want to spend their life with.



people evolve, people grow , they change. they tried different things in their life and they have found what works for them.



Sometimes I even think I have Gay-dar, like I think and am so sure I know when someone is gay, they just won't "admit" it. I may play around but I dont press the issue, we are all made of half female and male.



blah blah blah. thats my story.

I told you it was long!

2 comments:

claudia said...

damn...i think im in love....jk...but yeah its so true...i understand completely cuz i get stereotyped all the time...oh well

tillyvision said...

So true. Great blog :)